Excerpt from The Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Love

Robert Manni has graciously allowed me to post one of the main characters, Max Hallyday’s, insightful column excerpt from the book as a sneak peak into the book.

MAX HALLYDAY COLUMN FOR THE GUYS’ GUY’S GUIDE TO LOVE     11/19/11

MASKED MEN

Your letters say that you want the truth about men. I’m warning you—it ain’t pretty. But okay, here goes. Modern man is weak and increasingly susceptible to temptation. Look at the newspaper and you’ll see how men continue to succumb to their addictions of sex, greed, violence and hypocrisy. It’s time for women to rule this world in a better way—one man and one relationship at a time. And I’m here to help.

Fact: men lie—constantly. They do it to subdue the truth inside their poisoned consciousnesses. They hide. That’s why you must confront and unmask your man. Think of their heroes—Zorro, Batman, The Lone Ranger, Spiderman. They all wore masks, and for good reason. To hide their identity. Okay, it’s a metaphor, but it’s true. For you to build a successful relationship, you need to unmask your man and make him reveal himself, even if he doesn’t want to show you what’s inside. Don’t let your man get away with secrecy, because regardless of how much time you spend with him, you’ll remain alone if you let him hide what’s inside his heart. Why do men hide? Isn’t it obvious? Because they’re insecure and afraid they’re not good enough for you. They do it because they can—because you let them.

But if you succeed in discovering his truth, you’ll help your man become the person he wants to be—and the partner you deserve. Men need your help more than ever. Now, the good news. You can win. For the same reason a porcupine has quills and a turtle burrows into his shell for protection, women have been equipped with superior intuitive powers. While men waged wars wielding their brute strength and force, women were developing their sixth sense.  And the more you trust your gift—the one that tells you “I just know”—the more you’ll be rewarded.

Here’s a way to supercharge that gift. Men aren’t that complicated, not the way you and your friends think or hope they are. They’re creatures of habit who spend most of their lonely lives thinking about sex, eating, sleeping, drinking, thinking about sex, watching sports, listening to music, playing sports and video games, thinking about sex, and repeating the cycle. That’s about all. Don’t believe me? Just ask.

An endless stream of available gratuitous sexual imagery, rump-shaking hip-hop videos, and the nihilistic drone of heavy metal music choke the minds and lower the vibrations of modern males. And the declining standards propagated by reality television have taken their toll. Men are caught in a web of misinformation that force-feeds their lowest common denominators. They’ve lost touch with our values and respect for themselves…and for you.

How can you make it work? Simple—ask questions. And then ask more questions, and in a gentle yet determined way, keep asking, until you’ve pushed aside their fragile egos and revealed the man inside. And remember, you have to listen to what he says, not judge him. Really listen or else he won’t open up. Then it’s up to you to decide if he is worthy of your love. Sound easy? It is. Whatever answers you receive, even if they’re non-answers, the man is revealing himself. Find out how he feels about everything important in his life. If you stay on him, he’ll be grateful because—more good news—they really want to open up to you.

When you call at eleven, and above the background noises he tells you that he’s out with a few colleagues, that little voice inside you may have its doubts. Start asking him questions. Which bar? What’s the occasion? Who’s there? And don’t forget to follow up the next day, to make sure he was telling the truth. I’m not suggesting that you jack up the poor guy the minute he walks through the door, but over time, you can ferret out the seemingly innocuous information that will tell you what makes men tick.

Listen to your man—really listen! Then, heed your gift of intuition. When you do, you’ll know if he was out for an innocent night of beers and male bonding or trolling the bars in search of a little “something something” while you were curled up in your jammies watching Glee.

You deserve better.  You deserve the best—so start asking questions. You’ll be amazed at what you’ll learn—the good and the bad. And you’ll discover the man inside of your man. And if you’re not satisfied with what you find in his heart, let him go. Your heart is too wonderful a gift to open up for anything less than an honest man.

Until next time,
Rod

copyright 2010, Cindy (Cindy’s Love Of Books)
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